Optimism: My Weapon

I think it pays to be optimistic. Not only because of the general feeling you get by looking on the bright side of things, but logically speaking, most optimistic people are the ones who take risks and manage to succeed. It's not an issue of them being more skilled or talented (though from an argumentative standpoint, an optimistic person seems more likely to go through with an arduous task because they predict a successful outcome), but really what sets apart an optimistic person from someone more 'realistic' is the ability to pinpoint an opportunity under adverse situations or outcomes. It's a tough question to answer; whether this ability to see the silver lining arises from an inherent reason (making them optimistic) or whether it comes from the idea that they are optimistic by society's standards, thus making them push to see that beneficial side effect of an event.

Of course optimism can be seen as a tool rather than an attribute or feeling that someone carries. And like a tool, it has its uses during certain periods. For example, optimism during a crisis or terrible period is probably more detrimental to your well-being than it normally would. As Scott Adams (writer of Dilbert) outlined- your boss is more likely to fire the happy optimist than anyone else, since the optimist is the least likely to be a basketcase/crybaby when you decide to let them go. It depends on the context of the situation when to bring it around...it can be a weapon- helping you rally people towards your ideals, or it could be a shield- meant to defend yourself from the criticism and witticisms associated with something you inherently believe in.

To quote Penny-Arcade, I've always held the default emotion of cautious optimism. It makes sense in several ways. For one thing, it is the path of least resistance, since it fits under any context, meaning a change in environment or conditions doesn't require a drastic change in perspective, which by experience, is something difficult to achieve. Another advantage is it ensures you approach every condition with a logical approach, evaluating every opportunity that comes along. Be skeptical but be willing to believe that it is for the best, just because it may not agree with your compass.

The Goggles! They do nothing!

They were sitting on the rack; as inconspicuous as a pair of mirrored sheen lenses held together by thinly paired metal frames can possibly be. Instantly, as I gazed into my reflection staring back at me, I vaguely recalled the tale of Narrcissus. It couldn't do any harm to try them on, I thought. Donning the accessory, I found a conveniently placed mirror- just perfect for my height and witnessed the sight which would warp the notions I steadfastedly held for years- like a caged curmudgeon obstinate about the 'old days'. I felt like a Tom Cruise in his prime, without the gay innuendo, or the scattered-brain theories of a Scientologist disciple. Wearing the glasses made me feel like a hero, like someone with nary a thought about what could go wrong, but only what could go right. If confidence and kickasseery came in the form of an accessory, this instrument was the prototype- nay- the paradigm, from which all of it was wrought. With the stride of a man who had seen all and conquered all, with the walk of a man who knew the walk and did the talk, I made my way to the register, prize still equipped. Little did I realize, what monster I had unleashed within my psyche. And oh how the world will pay for it. Oh will it pay for it...


In case things weren't clear. I succumbed and bought a pair of aviators. And man do I rock it!

Manufactured Conflict

So the 'thrilling' feud between "Daily Show" host, Jon Stewart and "Mad Money's" Jim Cramer has come to an end. Both TV Celebrities shook hands and forged an agreement to return to their respective programming goals. For Cramer, that is asking tougher questions and more investigative tactics with regards to reporting and for Stewart: "making funny faces and fart noises".
Regardless of who you supported, plenty of interesting points were made. The question to what extent CNBC are responsible for their role in ensuring corporate governance and the audience to which it caters was the biggest area of inquiry. Stewart's biggest qualm was the fact that CNBC's overall reporting seemed to cater to different areas and the fact that they are unable to concile these views into a more thorough reporting style. CNBC (and Cramer) shot back that what would a comedian who presents a 'news' show on Comedy Central have with regards to true reporting and that he is guilty of the same thing, presenting serious issues with a flippant view.
What much of the media outlet did not present was that the 'feud' was strictly manufactured. Stewart never personally attacked Jim Cramer in his initial report about CNBC. He was attacking the network in general for what he saw was indirect manipulation of the market by ameliorating fears and hiding misgivings with a number of the big banks and corportations. Cramer happened to respond to Stewart's report as a means to defend himself from an attack that wasn't singly aimed at him. The response internalized the conflict to Cramer and Stewart, and CNBC simply gave Cramer a pat on the back and sent him as a 'scapegoat' of sorts to divert Daily Show's fire.
Of course once this happened, the remainder of the media outlet jumped on it and added fuel to the fire by emphasizing the Cramer vs. Stewart angle, as opposed to the original intention...Stewart vs. CNBC. It makes sense in a lot of ways. Internalizing the conflict means that we are directed away from the real issue- whether today's media outlets aren't asking hard enough questions or whether corporate interests overlay clear, insightful reporting. If the conflict remained situated to its original case of inquiry, I think we would see much more investigation about the level of 'collaboration' we see between reporting media and the subjects at hand. Despite the tone of this post, I think even if we didn't hit the mark with respect to asking and answering the right questions, it is a step in the right direction.

Nostalgia without the guilt

Tonight I decided to visit my campus, specifically a frat party, but not as a geezer, shamelessly trying to "hook-up" with those younger with me, but as an observer, of what it feels like to be the insider of a frat-house.

I came to the realization that a fraternity was much more than a monopoly on the college pussy and a bastion of power over the non-initiated and the individualized masses who yearned for an environment to drink and have fun on the expense of others. It truly was a brotherhood of people who supported one another, and ensured the maximum possible enjoyment and utility for all the members and partakers involved. As much as I opposed being chained to a single organization for enjoyment and experience of the college environment, I found myself a little jealous of the intimacy and general camaraderie enjoyed by the members of the frat. I think if I could experience college all over again, I would make an attempt to join a frat, despite the stereotypes and general connotation associated with the fraternity environment. It was something that couldn't be explained through a logical argument or through monetary concerns. The bond between members was more than the general association experienced between workmates or even friends in a collegiate environment. It was the fact that they had the same set of Greek letters which described their affiliation and the intimacy (in a non-sexual way as far as I can tell...) they shared. There truly was something indescribable from my limited vocabulary or my inept choice of words.

My role was strictly as an observer; of the experience I oversaw as a member of Penn's undergraduate student body. As much as I share an appreciation for a group that supported me both in academic and non-academic pursuits, I was always independent, relying on my own skills and a fair amount of luck to pull me through any endeavor I faced. This is how I came to the realizations above. I did my best (and succeeded) in observing the side of college I never faced...the role of a fraternity insider, one of the "bros" -if you will. Despite all the negative connotations associated with the average fraternity brother, there is a degree of moral standard that they follow, and while it is not in correspondence to the moral standard that society as a whole follows, from an outsider's perspective, it can be ordained as "good", at least for the members of the respective fraternity as a whole.

This is the impression I was left with. All in all, it was an experience in a good context. Eventually I would have to come to accept that college was over. The carefree attitude associated with the college experience had to come to an end, and the realization that I had to decide what to do with my life was to come. And the experiences and observations I made this weekend only emphasized this. I am no longer the undergrad. It is the opportunity for me to make my mark and make the world truly a better place.

Wanna get Phelpsed?

(Thanks to Brian Quimby for this awesome title...buy one of shirts btw: http://www.getphelpsed.com)

In a seedy locale in South Carolina, which could be only be construed as a college dorm room, a group of friends huddle in a circle. Thick wisps of smoke surround the gathering as they pass around a tubular apparatus from hand to hand. The energy in the room is faint but there, a sort of mellow flow which passes through each of the subjects, in their current escapades. Suddenly, one of them calls out at another. "Yo, Phelps! Wanna hit of this shit?" The student holds the instrument towards the ceiling with the air of a Grammy-award winner, or an individual who won 8 gold medals in an Olympic-type competition. The young man looks towards the summoner. Realizing he is among friends, all hesitancy dissipates and the man partakes in the bounty provided by his brothers. With deft hands, he extracts the tool from his compatriot and readies himself for the glorious feeling of the responsibility held by an Olympic Champion and representative of the USA being thrown off his shoulders, for at least a few hours.

So Phelps took a hit. Big deal. It's not like the guy decided to drive around right after getting high. And it's not like what he smokes in that bong can be construed as a 'Performance-Enhancing Drug (hmmm...note to self, examine athletic enhancing abilities of marijuana). The guy just took what is a not-very harmful drug in a private locale among the company of friends. Instead of attacking him for this infarction, we might as well go after the celebrities and athletes who are sponsored by or advocate the use of alcohol, cigarettes, painkillers and penis-enlarging medication. They're role models and representatives of this country to the world too.

At least he's not doing crack or heroin or murdering strippers.

Review of Dead Space

I just finished Dead Space a few days ago. The delay in a review culminates as a result of a chance to reflect upon the game (and the fact I've been addicted to Metal Gear Solid 4).



But before I begin the review it's important to know that I'm a big fan of survival horror games. Not so much for the reason that they are scary and I like a good fright. Or for the resource management requirements to complete the game. It's mainly because they're generally hard games, especially if you play on the normal difficulty.

The story begins with your character, Isaac Clarke (in a thinly veiled homage to sci-fi writers Isaac Asimov and Arthur C. Clarke), a system engineer who happens to be placed on a mission to determine why a planet-cracker star-ship has not been transmitting any communications. Add this to the fact that Isaac's ex-girlfriend is on the ship and the emergency transmission she sends directly addressing Isaac by name and you're good to go on this mission. Once you arrive- things generally go down hill from there, as you face off against an alien organism which reproduces by infecting the bodies of the dead. Suddenly you're separated from the rest of your crewmates in a giant self-sufficient ship with nothing more than a plasma cutter and your rig (a suit protecting you from vacuum and other lethal environments). Horror fans should generally recognize this. To set this apart from other horror-genre games, Dead Space does what System-Shock 2 (possibly the greatest game ever) and Bioshock (the System-Shock 2 ripoff) did. You get a handle on the rest of the story through a number of audio, video and text logs you find strewn about the ship from the former crew members. With that you are able to piece the story together of what went wrong and how you might get out of this alive.

Gameplay wise, think Resident Evil 4. Isaac is controlled through an over-the-shoulder camera view. Button configuration is designed similar to RE4 as well, with one button bringing his weapon up and other button to run. Thankfully, Isaac is able to side-step, strafe-run and actually continue to move while aiming his weapon which makes battles a much more fluid affair, which is an advantage that you'll need. The Necromorphs (as the enemy in this game are called) aren't like the standard zombie-fare- these creatures dash towards you, employ hit-and-run tactics and are intelligent about evading your attacks. While most of the enemy fights are scripted, they are positioned in such a way that there are several ways of fighting back, whether by brute force, using the environment, or under extraenuous circumstances...running away. The weapon choices while meant to be creative and 'futuristic' still adhere to the standard FPS fare. One weapon is a pistol-like weapon (Plasma-Cutter), one is a rapid fire (Pulse Rifle), one is a shotgun like (Force Gun), etc.

What saves the game from the standard survival-horror spiel, however are three things. The story, the sound and the enemies. The story while taking advantage of techniques pioneered in SS2, is paced in such a way that the player is genuinely interested in continuing to play. Each chapter you play through brings you closer to understanding the Necromorph hive-mind and creates a disconcerting view of the characters you being with, slowly making the game less about an alien horror and more of a psychological horror. This is, in turn, helped by masterful audio. In some places, it matches a horror movie, with a string quartets playing a high stacatto when Isaac opens a door to witness a grisly scene. And speaking of grisly scenes, this is probably the goriest game ever made. In addition to the blood on the walls, writing on the walls in blood, and the obligatory buckets of blood, there's a lot of limp-lopping going on (enemy deaths and even Isaac's death brings about sometimes ridiculous results with regards to the strength and durability of his body- since when did a door shutting on you result in your entire body exploding?). Which brings me to the third point- the Necromorphs are constructed with the remains of their human host with a number of sharp blades and point appendages sprouting out from their shoulders, backs and whatever else. A surprising revelation early on is that head-shots no longer work. Instead, Dead Space awards you by lopping off the limbs of your foes and punishes you for adheering to the head-shot mentality found in most other games. Removing a limb reduces the enemy's health as well as reduces their means of attack to simple bites, whereas removing the head just makes them more aggressive and wastes ammo. It is a mistake most first-time players will make but the game is paced well enough to give you the time to appreciate this discovery.

A decent one-sentence way to describe this game would be to think Resident Evil meets Event Horizon (a movie with very similar premises featuring Sam Neill and Laurence Fishburne). But regardless of whether you're a fan of either of those two, Dead Space still stands well on its own two (or more) legs.

Direction...

It's been a while since I wrote in this piece.

So I'm going to brief with this one. From now on, expect entries on random thoughts, blurbs, shit that yanks my chain, music and video games. Because I'm a gamer at heart. Oh and webcomics because that's my new favorite hobby.

And in other news...I've completed another composition. At least I've written the instrumentation right now. I still have to record the drum parts and write some lyrics for the thing.

And I need a new personal statement.